HUMOUR

Le petit génie et le directeur d’école ...                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Le petit Thomas demande à sa maîtresse s’il peut lui parler après le cours. Elle accepte.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             La maîtresse : Alors, que veux-tu me dire, Thomas ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Thomas : Je pense être trop intelligent pour rester dans cette classe, je m’embête ! Je voudrais passer directement au Lycée.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Sur ce, le directeur informé, demande à Thomas s’il veut bien passer des tests. Thomas accepte sans hésiter, le directeur débute les tests.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Le Directeur : Voyons voir Thomas, 3 x 4                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Thomas : Douze !                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Le Directeur : Et 6 x 6
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Thomas : Trente six, Monsieur le Directeur.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Le Directeur : Capitale du Japon ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Thomas : Tokyo
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Le test continue pendant une demi-heure, Thomas ne fait aucune erreur !A la fin du test, le directeur est satisfait mais, la prof demande si elle peut à son tour lui poser des questions. Tous deux acceptent, et la prof commence.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   La Maîtresse : Bon Thomas ! La vache, elle en a 4 et moi j’en ai 2, qu’est-ce que c’est ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Thomas : Les jambes, Madame.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    La Maîtresse : Correct ... Qu’est-ce qu’on trouve dans tes pantalons et pas dans les miens ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Le Directeur s’étonne de la question …
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Thomas : Des poches, Madame.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           La Maîtresse : Bien, Thomas. Qu’est-ce que les hommes et les femmes ont en plein milieu et qui est en double ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Le directeur se prépare à intervenir lorsque Thomas répond.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Thomas : Les deux « M », Madame.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               La Maîtresse : Où est-ce que les femmes ont les poils les plus frisés ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           Thomas : En Afrique Madame, répond le gamin sans hésiter.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  La Maîtresse : Qu’est-ce qui est mou mais qui, aux mains d’une femme, devient dur ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Le Directeur ouvre grands les yeux mais Thomas répond :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Le vernis à ongles, Madame.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     
                               
Le Directeur n’en croit pas ses oreilles !
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     La Maîtresse : Quelle est la partie de mon corps qui est souvent la plus humide?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Thomas : Votre langue, Madame.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      La Maîtresse : Quel mot commençant par la lettre « C » désigne quelque chose qui peut être humide ou sec et que les hommes aiment regarder ?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Thomas : Le ciel ! Affirme Thomas.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Le Directeur soufflant, transpirant, décide d’arrêter le test et s’exclame :
- Ce n’est pas au lycée que je vais t’envoyer Thomas, mais directement à l’université ! Même moi, je n'aurais pas réussi ce test !                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              " Morale de l’histoire : C’est avec l’âge que l’on devient pervers ! "