HUMOUR

MARIAGE :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        "Union qui permet à deux personnes de supporter des choses qu'ils n'auraient
pas eu besoin de supporter s'ils étaient restés seuls".

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Théorie du mariage :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         1)  Le mariage est une institution.
2)  Le mariage c'est l'amour
3)  L'amour est aveugle.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Conclusion  :  le mariage est une institution pour les aveugles !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        - Si l'amour est un rêve, le mariage serait bien le réveil matin !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   - Le mariage n'est pas la mer à boire mais la belle-mère à avaler !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              " La vie maritale est très frustrante " :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              La première année de mariage, l'homme parle et la femme écoute. La deuxième année, la femme parle et c'est l'homme qui écoute. A partir de la troisième année, ce sont les deux qui parlent, et les voisins qui écoutent.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    "LES JOIES DU MARIAGE EN 10 LEÇONS" :

                                                                                                                                                                                             1. Négligence :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Le moyen le plus efficace de se rappeler la date d'anniversaire de votre femme est de l'oublier une fois.

                                                                                                                                                                                                       2. Appétit :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Le mariage, c'est comme un dîner au restaurant. À peine servi, on regarde dans l'assiette du voisin.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    3. Curiosité :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Un petit garçon demande à son père: "Papa, combien ça coûte de se marier? Le père: "Je ne sais pas, j'ai pas encore fini de payer..."

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         4. Avertissement :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          "On ignore ce qu'est le vrai bonheur avant d'être marié... Et alors il est trop tard" !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        5. Dispute :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Le mari  : J'étais idiot quand je t'ai épousé. La femme  : Oui, mais j'étais amoureuse alors je n'ai pas remarqué !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          6. Petite annonce :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Un homme passe une annonce dans un journal qui dit  : "Je cherche une épouse" ... Le lendemain, il reçoit la réponse suivante  : 
"J'en ai justement une à la maison. Servez-vous."

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         7. Citation :
"Le pire que vous puissiez faire à l'homme qui vous a pris votre femme,c'est de la lui laisser" !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 8. Réflexion :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Un  mariage c'est la victoire de l'imagination sur l'intelligence. Un second  mariage, c'est le triomphe de l'espoir sur l'expérience.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       9. Entre femmes :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Une femme fait la remarque suivante à l'une de ses amies  : "Tu ne t'es pas trompée de doigt en enfilant ton alliance ?"
L'autre répond  : "Si, c'est parce que je me suis trompée de mari" !

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  10. Entre hommes :
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         "C'est quoi pour toi la définition parfaite du mariage ?"  ... "C'est une façon extrêmement coûteuse de faire laver son linge gratuitement !"